A Hard Recovery

It has been 47 days since Ella had surgery and I must say nothing has been the same since. I think everyday that I made the wrong decision. Don't get me wrong, things could be much worse she is overall healthy but she is so different. She cries more than she ever has and she won't take a bottle at all now. I know the issue is weight gain...but after a month with the feeding tube she gained no weight. I am just needing to see results, I am not always a patient person. :) The doctor keeps telling me to try to feed her more but I already feed her 5oz every 3hrs and that takes about 20 - 40 mins to do so its a little hard to find time in between feedings, diapers throw-ups...then clean-ups and all the other stuff to add other feedings??? I know things will get better with time when I get used to dealing with this new feeding tube, but in the mean time its crazy around here! On a more positive note- She is starting to do so much. She is always laughing at toys and loves music! She is showing really good cognitive signs like crying for me when I leave(not good for the person keeping her but good from a nuro. stand point)stranger anxiety and pushing her therapist hands away when she wants them to leave her alone.LOL These are all great things for her. She is so sweet and that little smile of hers will always out weight all the crazy and keep me going!